So the past few weeks have been rough. Really rough. And I am pretty sure that most of it is my fault. Apparently, homeschooling, step-mom-ing, and guilt all go hand in hand.
In picking my curriculum, I really tried to follow what C was doing in school before he left. Homeschooling, for us, is an experiment, and we are taking it year by year. Thus, C knows he can go back in 8th grade, and I know he could go back in 8th grade. I've had a hard time letting go of "what we're supposed to do in 7th grade", so I have been a good little teacher with our textbooks for science and social studies. But you know what? They. Are. So. Boring. They bore me, and I love to read and I really like life science (chemistry I can live without, life science is so fun!). If they bore me, you can bet C hates them. But I have this fear that if I throw out the "what we're supposed to do in 7th grade" curriculum, then he won't be prepared for 8th grade, he'll fail out of 8th grade, and then have a horrible life and it will be all. my. fault. So I've held onto to the horrible, boring curriculum and we have both been unhappy.
Enter Spring Break. All C's friends from public school are on Spring Break this week, so we're doing a sort of break too. His only subjects are reading and math, and we're hoping to have a couple of his friends over one night. I'm really trying to use this time to work on our relationship, because I feel like over the past few weeks I have turned into this bad cop who has ruined his life.
Monday, while he was relaxing outside, I pulled out a first year of homeschooling book in the hopes that I would get some encouragement. Scattered throughout the book are shorts from other homeschooling moms sharing what they wished someone had told them for their first year. One really stood out for me:
"I started out determined to be the 'best' and 'stay focused' on scheduled academics. What I found was that this attitude only results in the same unnecessary stress that the public schools place on students and parents alike." (page 46 of The First Year of Homeschooling Your Child)
Oh I cannot even express how much I needed to hear that. My clinging to a set curriculum and what we needed to get done each day has made our days just like what we were trying to get away from. Soooo....I'm revamping things. I hit the massive used bookstore down the street, picked up books that I though C would be more interested in than these textbooks, and starting Monday I am going to be much more relaxed about school. I'll let you know how it goes :-).
